The Introvert Who Reads

I recently read a couple articles that seemed as though they were written about me. They resonated so strongly with me, and I feel the need to share.

A Girl You Should Date
Some excerpts:
"You see the weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a second hand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow."

"Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by god, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book."

"She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are."



10 Myths About Introverts
This one made me so relieved to know that I'm definitely not the only one who feels this way. Many a time, I force myself to put on my extrovert mask, and I go out and have a brilliant time, partying away. More often than not, these events make me feel drained and depressed. Reading this article helped me realise why I get agitated after a while in a club, or why I breathe a little easier if I have my earphones in while negotiating crowds.

Food & Sleep. Too Much of Both.

I'm glad this past weekend was a long one. Well, technically, I didn't get a long weekend, seeing as how I was in the office all day Saturday. Still, I had Monday off, which worked out really well.

On Sunday, we went to see a play by We Colour People, which is a non-profit theatre society. They've staged an annual production since 2008, and I started attending them in 2009. I adored the past two productions, and was looking forward to this year's. It was called SABOsTAGE, an improv comedy which was pretty much Whose Line, only with a local flavour. Although I do feel that improv has a long way to go in Singapore, on the parts of both actors and audience, I quite enjoyed this production.

After that, we adjourned to Newton Circus for Singaporeans' favourite hobby (well, after shopping and complaining, of course). Foodage! And oh my gosh, there was so much foodage. As is the case whenever BIL!S is around! His motto: "Don't think; just eat". And eat we did.

Barbecued chicken wings, oyster omelette aka or luak, barbecued stingray with lots of sambal, fried squid, mantou, which were lovely when dipped in the lala (clam) gravy, all washed down with sugarcane juice. Oh, and I think there were vegetables too, of which I didn't touch.

We were all stuffed! And we couldn't even think of dessert. Until the table was cleared. My family, being the OCD sufferers that we are, had to get the table cleared before we could relax. After that, all of a sudden, all of us had room for dessert! BIL!Mike and I shared a bottle of really, really cold beer, and there were bowls of ice kachang all round.

Good food, great conversation, excellent company. What a perfect way to spend a Sunday!

Finally got home about 1, where I vegged out on the couch while putering. Staggered upstairs to bed about half 3 in the am. Thank goodness Babygirl let me sleep in yesterday!

Wouldn't have made much of a different if I hadn't slept in.... instead of going to IKEA as previously planned, I ended up napping all afternoon, catching up on some much needed Zs.

Not sure how I managed to get to sleep last night, after having slept so much in the day, but I did sleep well. And woke up bright and early this morning for work. Got to the office at 7!

Of course...now I'm started to get tired again...

Out of Steam

I was super productive the first half of this week. I was working through half the lunch hour, I stayed late one evening, and I got a lot accomplished.

At home, I went into a cleaning frenzy; I cleaned out my closet and got rid of quite a lot of clothes. I did some major cleaning out of my desk and dresser area. I'm waiting for my brother and bro-in-law to be around over the weekend, so they can do some heavy lifting. Getting rid of the table/shelves in my room, and moving a shelving unit from Mum's room to mine.

In short, I accomplished a lot in a couple days. And I had such fun too! Don't even get me started on how happy I get when I'm organising things.

Yesterday and today, however...my mojo seems to have taken a break. I'm all bleh and meh now, and quite unmotivated indeed. Did I use up all of my productivity quota at the beginning of the week?

Good thing it's FRIIIIDAAAAYY.


I need a nap. Preferably one lasting at least 3 hours.

Attack of the Killer Lizard

Wow, this has been some week!

Went out with the parents and Calis on Sunday, for Mothers' Day, and had a lovely time with them. Made plans to meet JJ for happy hour on Monday, but I couldn't make it for some reason I can't remember right now, so changed the date to Tuesday. Tuesday afternoon, Mum called me in the office and said that she had to go to the hospital. Turns out she was severely anaemic, and needed a blood transfusion.

Mum spent a couple days in the hospital, and she came home Thursday. I'm so glad and relieved she's ok. Calis missed her terribly when she was away, and I was, frankly, really worried, even though I played it down for Nan and Calis.

Anyway, I cancelled on JJ, and I also cancelled on My Girls (I was supposed to meet them on Wednesday), so I could take care of Calis and things at home. Today, I decided that since Dad was home and could keep an eye on things (and Mum!), I would go out for dinner and drinks. I'd spoken to Terry on Sunday, and we said end of the week, so I gave him a shout, and off we went!

Ended up going to Miss Clarity Cafe down on Purvis Street. I was there almost exactly a year ago! And me being me, I ate almost the exact same thing. Terry and I split everything - a lovely, thick mushroom soup, a delightful paella with chorizo, ham and bacon (can never go wrong with bacon, really), and the exact same dessert I had last time. And Terry and I both agreed that the best desserts are those that are a mixture of hot and cold, especially if there's chocolate involved.

Strolled around a bit, and went to Loof for drinks. It's quite amusing, really. I think the last time I met him, we ended up at Loof as well. We hung out so much longer than I'd thought we would, and I had a brilliant time. It's been years since we last met, and I really think we shouldn't let another couple years pass just like that.

Got home about 15 minutes ago, and popped into the shower. Hung up my towel, stripped, and then took off my glasses. Turned on the shower, and what do I see? A HUGE LIZARD. Alright, I'm really not sure how big it really was, since I'm blind without my specs, but I could tell it was pretty darn big. (Big for a house lizard, not big like monitor lizard. Thank goodness.)

I froze, lizard scuttled off. Thing is, I couldn't see where it had gone to. For all I know, it was hiding behind my towel! So I put my glasses back on, showered in double-quick time, brushed my teeth, and...well, I wasn't about to risk grabbing my towel! What if killer lizard had jumped out at me?! I COULD HAVE DIED.

Yes, I snuck out of bathroom butt naked and dripping wet. Thank goodness I always have a smaller towel hanging on the back of my bedroom door! I'm now safe in bed, and going to watch one more episode of QI before I have to wake up for work. In...4 hours, guh.

I hope lizard doesn't find its way to my bedroom. I really should booby trap the perimeter.

Red Bull Week; Final Day

It always amuses me to see someone else's desktop cluttered with icons. I simply don't understand how anyone can work with such a mess on their desktop. Makes me wonder if their physical desk is just as cluttered! How do they locate anything? Every one of my files are neatly labelled and slotted into their proper places. Just the way it should be. I like my desktops empty, save for the things I'm immediately working on. It's just so much better that way.

Speaking of the things that I'm working on, I can now transfer my presentations from my desktop to the proper folder. I'm done with presentations! If I may say so myself, I think I did a pretty good job. For the amount of effort I put into them...well, the output was a lot better than I'd expected!

Of course...that's just my opinion, which is quite biased.

I'm starting to get hungry....I think we're going for lunch in a bit. LUNCH!

---

After lunch now!

We all went to Han's, and now I'm stuffed. And oh so sleepy! Oh silly me, I didn't pick up a Red Bull on the way! No matter, I did have a coffee, I'm going to make myself a cup of tea now, and perhaps it's a good thing to not drink Red Bull - it would probably make my cough worse.

Urgh. Time to wake up and pay attention!

Baking Day....is almost over.

So.

Sugee cake is baked and cooled and ready for icing.
Rock buns are baked and cooled and reading for putting into tupperwares.
Mum has done her pineapple tarts, and will be making more this week.
Mum's also finished her mince pies.
My experimental stollen is in the oven. I will of course let you know how that turns out.

Shame about this diet I'm on though. I'm not taste testing anything; I'm relying on Mum for that.

Speaking of Mum, she's hilarious.

Conversation between us went as follows:
Me: Give me a hand with the marzipan later?
Mum: Sure. Are you icing the top and bottom?
Me:...No, Mum. I'm icing the top and sides.

Mum and I laughed ourselves silly over that for a good five minutes.

About half an hour later, I'm turning the rock buns out onto a baking sheet. Some of them are upside down, so I'm turning them right side up. I repeat, I'm turning them right side up.
This little exchange ensues:

Mum: Why are you turning the rock buns upside down?
*Mum takes a sip of coffee*
Me: So I can ice the bottoms.
*Mum spits coffee in my face and dies laughing*
*I'm glad coffee is cold and dies laughing*

A good laugh later, Mum says, "How stupid of you. You don't ice rock buns."


Anyone who's not sure where I get my weird sense of humour only has to talk to Mum to figure that one out.

120 rock buns. Without icing.

Just because

Both Doof and Neko read the subject of my last post as "Bits and Boobs". That amuses me greatly.

Also, I mentioned in said last post that I'd rather forget a strange dream I had. I just realised that actually mentioning it on my blog, and then describing it to Neko afterwards... probably wouldn't help me forget it!

I have nothing else to say, really. I just wanted to make a gratuitous mention of Doof.
Doof doof doof. Hmm, now I just feel like listening to some trance.

Oh, alright. Just so this post isn't totally useless, I do have a revelation to share. You know how in job interviews, interviewers almost always ask about strengths and weaknesses? Well, it's easy enough for me to talk about my strengths; the challenge comes in keeping it brief! I have struggled with the 'weakness' section though...I've never really been sure of what to say.

It hit me today - one of my weaknesses? I'm reluctant to ask for help, even when I'm completely snowed under. I'd much rather work through lunch, put in ridiculous amounts of overtime and deprive myself of sleep, than to ask someone else to help me out.
This is mostly because of another weakness that I have - my need to have control and order. And my belief that if you want something done properly, you have to do it yourself. And then there's my OCD nature which makes me twitch when someone else takes over and does it "wrongly". And of course, if they 'help' me out, I'll still have to look everything over, and I'll probably end up redoing it, thus spending even more time on a task than I would have without asking for help.

Uh...ok, so perhaps my unwillingness to ask for help isn't my only weakness.

I have issues...and I'm proud of them.

Yeah, that's about it. I gotta get back to work now.


Doof.

I'm not crazy. You just don't do it right.

Some time ago, Sis1, Sis2, Aunt Debs and myself were swapping stories about how anal retentive particular we are about certain things.
How our clothes are ironed. (Come on, you gotta iron the lining. And pockets. And the lines have to be perfect.)
How pots and pans are stored. (Sets go together. Biggest at bottom, smallest at top.)
How books are arranged. (By genre. Then by author. In my case, by publisher.)
How clothes are hung to dry. (By type and colour. And facing the same way.)
How cans are placed in cupboards/shelves. (By product, by type. Labels must face front.)

And...the list goes on. And on. And on. And so on and so forth. And then some.

Bro-In-Law2, who is within earshot, shakes his head and comments that it sounds as though we're all competing to see who's craziest.


Last night, I was chatting with Mum. It was lovely to sit down and talk with her; we haven't had a proper chat in ages. But anyway. She told me about what Aunt Debs mentioned earlier in the day.

OCDish people like us are process-oriented. Everyone who does it "wrong" is goal-oriented.

At the end of the day, we achieve similar goals. Cans are put away in cupboards. Clothes are hung up and get dry. Books are on the shelves. But it's HOW we do it that's important.

And you know what? People think we're crazy for doing things the way we do. Why should it matter if money is arranged in my wallet, not only by denomination, but also by all the notes facing the same way? After all, it's still money.

I assure you: There is a method to our madness.

First and foremost, arranging things properly? It's aesthetically pleasing!

And well...It makes perfect sense. It makes life so much easier. It puts order in an otherwise chaotic world.

When I open the kitchen cupboard, I can see everything at a glance.
I can close my eyes and pick out whatever book I want from my shelves - and at most, I'm only one book off.
When I'm at work, I don't have to look for things - I automatically pick up whatever I need, because I know exactly where they are.

So go ahead, call us crazy. OCD. Anally retentive. High maintenance. Call us whatever you want!


We're still doing it our way. And our way? It's the right way.

When Mental Disorders Collide

I've always prided myself on being a multitasker. I can be in the middle of several projects at once. I can read several books at a go, keeping track of all the plotlines and characters. I can be hooked on several TV shows at any given moment, recalling quotes, episodes, characters, plots. Ok, not so much on that last one; my memory gets a bit fuzzy when I watch tv shows marathon-style.

Yesterday's affirmation though, pulled me up short.

Today I shall very consciously "do one thing at a time".

That got me thinking. Yes, I do several things at any one time, juggling tasks and responsibilities. That's always suited lil ol' me, as ADD as I am. But what if I were to focus my energies on one thing and only one thing?

And so I went about my day, trying my darndest to focus on only one task at hand.

I'd do things the normal way. Start-do-complete-file away. Start-do-complete-file away. I'd focus my energy on doing only one thing at a time.

Which is when I realised that...it's just not me. Sure, wrapping things up and putting them away neatly appeals to my OCD tendencies. But it took even more energy for me to keep a reign on my attention span. It was, to say the least, extremely tiring.

So I decided to revert to form for a while, to see how that would go.
(Note: 'revert' = to return to a former habit, practice, belief, condition, etc. It does NOT mean 'to respond'. Next time you're using 'revert' in an email, stop and think.)

And it worked so much more.

Letting myself get distracted every now and again with an email, a tweet or a brief zone-out actually leads to me being more productive and efficient. My mind flits around so much, that in the middle of doing something, a thought or question will pop in. So I'll take a minute to look it up, then go back to my original task, curiosity satisfied. When I tried to remain only on one task, the random thought would be nagging me, thus rendering me unable to actually work. Then when I finally decide to look it up, I realise that I've forgotten what it was that I wanted to check, afterwhich I waste a good few minutes trying to recall it.

So, as always, I'm doing things my way.

Pandering to my ADD side by allowing myself little distractions and mini-tasks.
Satisfying my OCD side by keeping things around me in their specific place, thus helping me be calmer and more efficient.



Insane people are always sure that they are fine. It is only the sane people who are willing to admit that they are crazy.
-- Nora Ephron

Anaesthesia is fun!

Hee.

I can't feel half my face. The entire right side of my face is completely numb. Pulling my ear and prodding my chin...feels like I'm playing with rubber.
Can't feel my tongue.

When I smile, I look more like I'm snarling.

When I blink, I look like this ;| because my right eye can't close!

Hmm. I taste blood. Yummy.

And I've just discovered something! If I turn my head to the left, I get really dizzy! Wheeeeee!